Monday, April 26, 2010

Day 78 - 5 days to go!! Rainy days and Mondays...

UGH.  I think I'm getting scared.

I felt super unmotivated today, in fact, I've felt a bit unmotivated the last few days.

The pouring rain kind of screwed me out of running outside, I finally dragged myself to the gym - only to get on the treadmill and find that my i-pod must really be dead. (I thought the other day was maybe a flukey, forgot to charge issue.) I did plug it in all last night so it's no fluke - it's deader than a a door nail and with only five days to go, I'm gonna have to figure something out.

So I got to the gym and still didn't feel like doing anything and with the dead I-Pod just decided to do a 20 minute power walk while watching Dr. Oz and even that dragged.

What's wrong with me!?

Am I self sabotaging?  Is it fear?  I mean five days to go - I've come this far and now I'm doubting myself, am feeling like blowing off training and can barely get thru a 20 minute walk??  Oh brother.  If I was self analyzing myself, my psychology 101 assessment would be I'm backing off from training as a defense mechanism, to protect myself from the potential of failure.

Or I'm just making that up.  I don't know.  Sigh.  I'll get it together and rally.

Hopefully the sun will come out tomorrow and I'll be back on track - 3 mile run tomorrow no matter what, even if I have to sing to myself the whole time!

XO
Jen
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