Turning up the heat

Sorry for the lack of posts, it's been a strange few weeks with not much to report.

I've been a little bummed- my Weight Watcher meeting has fallen apart. For whatever reasons, WW took away my leader's Sat. morning meeting. I've lost all of my weight with this leader and we were a tight group. I am "making it work" but it's been a tough adjustment. It may sound dramatic and I know that the weight loss and exercise is my journey but that meeting has been a tremendous support to me. If you know anything about food addicts and emotional eaters (which I consider myself somewhere between the two) we need very little excuse to justify falling backwards. My first reaction to this news was well "f'in WW is screwing me over. Great. Now I'm going to gain my weight back because I'm never going to a meeting again." By the way, this was the reaction of quite a few other members.

I know, I know. That's a childish and ridiculous reaction. Dropping out and eating doesn't hurt WW it hurts me. I've become rational enough to recognize that but this childish, gut reaction is what happens to many of us in these situations.

Ultimately, it's my journey. I will not sabotage my efforts anymore because of issues. I will deal. I will put on my big girl pants and accept that sh*t happens and work it out. While it sucks, it's an opportunity to grow, evolve and take something away from it.

So with that, I've been bouncing around with my weight but keeping it contained. I am tracking and keeping a stricter eye on stuff.

Heat has been ON! Today is another 100+ day with high humidity.

Thankfully, I've been getting some miles in at the gym - but I've been having a real tough time turning the corner in running longer. (Though I'm happy to say that I've been running faster!)

It's so easy to go for 2 - 4 miles but there's something about venturing beyond lately. Partly because I hate running in heat and I hate running more than 4mi. on a treadmill… sigh.

I think having a lack of a real event on the calendar is causing a lack of direction. I am "pretty sure" that I'm running something in Atlantic City on October 16th - haven't committed to the half or full but probably leaning towards the half. It's tough having fuzzy goals and vague idea of what I'm doing - so that's not motivating me to do long runs either.  Hmmm. I can't seem to pull the trigger on either because if I pay for the half, I know that I'm going to feel like I'm wimping out but won't push myself to train up to the full and if I pay for the full, I'm going to kick myself when I see that I have to get an 18 mile run in  during the busy and hot weeks ahead.

WAH, WAH, WAH.

Jeeze. This posts sounds way more whiney than I meant it to sound!

In spite of all this whining - summer has been going along and I'm enjoying it.

How are you dealing with the heat? What races are you training for? How do you get motivated to do longer runs if you don't have a race on the calendar?

Hope summer is treating you well :)

XO
Jen

Pain is temporary pride forever -- 16 miles!

I ran 16 miles today -- holy cow! 16 miles! It was one of the harder things I've done in my life but I am so happy after today's run. 

The first few miles I'm usually a little itchy. It seems, leave it to me, I am allergic to running. Stop laughing. I'm serious. This is where 99% of my friends sarcastically insert, "yeah. Me too." 

I always get itchy hives when I run and it's been a mystery. I thought it was the pants, then I thought it was the detergent, then I just chalked it up to being a weird-o, but nope, it's been determined - I have something called exercise-induced Urticaria  it's not that big of a deal - the hives go away after a half an hour after running and they (random folks on the internet) say I can take an otc allergy med before running to help (haven't tried that yet) but it is annoying to be running and itchy.  Oh well. But, yeah. Awesome. At least I'm not a weird-o (at least for this reason).

Anyway, despite looking like a crazy person as I scratch my legs while I'm running, I am pretty strong up until 8 miles and then the hips and lower back pain kicks in -- thankfully by miles 12 and above the lactic acid and cramping have taken over my hamstrings and glutes, so that I no longer think about the hip pain so much. LOL and by this time, I've totally forgotten about the hives… so that's all good. :)

But in-spite of all the discomfort, I really felt great today. I felt alive and focused. When things got tough with pain I chanted, "Pain is temporary, pride forever" I remembered how running for 2 minutes straight once felt impossible, and then running a mile without walking an impossible dream and now -- today I ran for SIXTEEN MILES… just ten-point-two short of the finish line.

And yes, upping the miles even more is scary and intimidating but I believe in believing that I can do it. I love the Ford quote, "If you believe you can or you believe you cannot - you are right."

While I'm still not the quickest runner in the park and I'm still eating lots of fancy looking runners dust, I felt super victorious today and I really, really, mentally needed to get to mileage like this.

I am not going to sweat this training anymore. I'm going to do the very best I can. I'm going to get to San Diego and then somehow I will run a marathon.

XO

Jen