Baby, I've got the post-marathon blues

classes up the car - dontcha think?

This has happened after my first half but I'm especially feeling it now after the marathon...

The build up, anxiety, ups & downs, excitement and anticipation for the "big day" seems to be an addictive thing for me. The race comes and goes and then I'm left feeling a little lost. A little blah.

It's over.

Long runs on ice in January, cross-training thru injuries in February, playing catch up in April and May, dreading all those scary long runs…

Poof.

Gone.

I think that's why so many of us run out and immediately sign up for the next race. I'm thinking about what my next move is. I'm itching to take the plunge into another full (like a drug addict looking for his next fix) but don't know if that's the post-race depression speaking so I'm taking my time on that. I know another half is in my future for sure.

And I think what's making this round of blues even worse is (and now I know what Lesley meant after her first race recap) I don't really feel like a marathoner.

If you haven't read my race recap check it out for the full enchilada but in a nutshell, I had a tough race tummy-wise. My stomach revolted and I feel like I spent more time in port-o-potty's than I did on the road! I was forced to really slow my roll and spent a lot of the time walking

My finish time was an unenviable 6+ hours and my legs were so "under-spent" that by the next day I barely felt like I had even done a long run.

I never hit the wall, I never really cramped, I barely limped. The next day I headed up to Los Angeles nearly pain free. Huh? I just "ran" a marathon and feel this 'good'? And I don't say that with pride. I say that with a sense of disappointment.  Sick - huh?

Which ironically might be part of the problem. I think if it took me 6+ hours to finish and I felt that I 'left it all out there' and had the war wounds and pain to wear as a badge of honor I might feel differently.

Which is absolutely insane. I know. Most people are going to think I'm an idiot for even talking about being rueful over this.

I've always been afraid of pain, convinced the wall would stop me in my tracks. We train so we can do this and not die… I don't know. You think I would be content with crossing the finish line and with making it in spite of the stomach issues trying to stop me…

Believe me, I know that this is nuts. If it were a friend saying this to me, I'd enthuse, "you ran an f'in marathon - doesn't matter if it took you six DAYS - I would tell them that the tummy thing was God's way of sparing you leg pain" and that "many people never even run a cumulative 26 miles in their lifetimes… never mind all in a row!"  I've been trying to say these things to myself but it's still not taking away my feeling of feeling a bit like a marathoning fraud.

I am proud of getting thru in the face of tummy issues. I am proud that I had the courage to "go for it" and the commitment to get there. There are many, many positive things I have gained from the experience, so I'm not entirely gloomy about the whole thing.

Even if I'm a little apprehensive about it, I still call myself a marathoner and I did put my 26.2 sticker on my car but I think I'll leave the tattoo for after the next one - because the tattoo shouldn't hurt more than the race.

XO
Jen

TWENTY miles, I ran twenty miles!!

OMG! I ran 20 miles.

I needed to run 20 miles.

I was dreading running 20 miles.

I didn't really need to run 20 - Coach Lesley told me it would suffice for me to do 16 or 18 and more important that I have a good run than a bad one with a lot of miles.  I entertained doing less more than once.

But I needed to do 20, to just mentally *know* I could.  In my heart I feel that if I can run 20 I can do 26.2 - it was an important number to hit for my mental preparedness and a huge milestone in the face of all the bumps in my training I've hit along the way.

But I will not lie. I was dreading it.

My 16 miles and 18 mile long runs hurt. A lot. And they weren't very encouraging that I could actually pull off much more. I also dreaded it because as much as I like to run, running for 3-4 hours just doesn't give me a thrill. I mean I get bored watching my favorite band in concert after 2 hours or so, so ya know. The prospect of running for a million hours… Well. That's just tough to get amped for.

But be that as it may, I sucked it up and headed out for the 20.

I did things way different this time. I decided that I would do my own "Galloway" experiment with walking and running. Since I'm not aiming for any sort of time on this thing - my big goal is just to finish,  I would see if that would do me any better. I also purposely slowed my run waaaay down.

What a huge difference.

I will not say it was easy but even at 20 miles the "wall" never came. In my last two runs I hit walls around 13 - 14 miles and thought I was gonna die.

The first 13 I walked for a tenth of a mile at the end of every mile - it actually made things enjoyable. I walked, hydrated, popped a jelly bean and let go of any sort of "time" deadline. It really kept me fresh. Past 15 I walked much, much more and that was more because of stomach cramps than leg issues. Again, I was OK with walking as I needed to. I didn't berate myself - I know that for me and where I am at with training, I'm going to be walking a lot those latter miles so I might as well embrace it.

Sure I will be slow, there will be no record breaking time, no BQ'ing that's for sure :D but I will be a marathoner and I think this approach will not only allow me to finish but keep me injury free and make the experience a good one!!!

Now, hopefully I'll have the discipline on game day to keep my roll slow and stick to the plan!! ;)

20 miles! No matter what happens from this day forward, no one can take that away from me and I'm soooo happy about it.

XO
Jen

San Diego Rock and Roll marathon course video!

Many people say that you should try to drive the course you'll be running to get a feel for what to expect.

Since I'll probably not be visiting San Diego before race day, this seemed pretty impossible until, lucky me stumbled on something even better - VIDEO!

I had no idea that this existed but after kicking around the SD RNR site for a bit - found it.

Yeeeeee ha.

Some of it looks city-ish and the highway looks slightly boring but all in all it seems I'll have a lot to look around at as I run.  For better or worse I am signed up and California here I come!!



XO

Jen

No turning back now - it's official, I'm registered for my first FULL marathon

So yeah, I'm in. Took the plunge, dove into the pool, plunked down my credit card and signed up for San Diego Rock and Roll Full marathon... all 26.2 miles of it.

I guess I should thank the blogging community for it all...

Without it, I wouldn't have publicly made the commitment (without the public expectation, I prob would've changed my mind already) and then to be named a "role model" well, what choice do I have really?

It'll be great. Gulp.

The words "Rock and Roll" in the title of the race makes everything cool - no?

It's only one mile 26.2 times or so... I could do that. I think.

Oh boy. Well there's no turning back now. I'm going to train and train hard. I know there'll be runs in the wind, and long runs on the "dread mill" in the middle of winter... I know it's going to be challenging but walk, run, skip or crawl - I'm gonna give it my all.

By the way, plenty of time for you to sign up and do it with me... here's a code to use at checkout and save a few bucks: sdsurvey10

XO
Jen